Juggling: the reality of being a work at home mum

Rosalie

Back in November I wrote about how I had made the decision to become a work at home mum, and I shared some of my thoughts and feelings about it. At the time I think the excitement of starting a new venture coupled with the relief that I didn’t have to put Rosalie into nursery were the over-riding factors in making the decision.

I would miss this face too damn much if she was at nursery all day!

R and mummy

Several months in and the best way I can describe my life at the moment is a juggling act. I am so conscious that having made the decision to stay at home with Rosalie I need, and want, to be there for her, playing with her, taking her to places and helping her to develop. But sometimes during the day I find my mind wandering to my to-do list and all the things I want to achieve during Rosalie’s afternoon nap. Then I feel guilty for wishing away our time together.

But it’s not really like that. I am not wishing away our time together. I just want to make sure I manage my time most efficiently so that I can get everything done and spend quality time with her. I certainly don’t think there is anything wrong with having Rosalie crawl around the house with me whilst I do chores – she quite likes pulling socks off the airer, finds the vacuum cleaner monster amusing and I’m sure she enjoys watching me bake – and I also think having time to play alone is good for children as it gives them a chance to develop their imagination. But what I don’t want is to be hiding behind my laptop working when I should be reading Rosalie a story or building towers for her to knock down.

So I juggle. I plan like crazy, make copious to-do lists and set myself achievable goals so that I don’t lose focus. I work hard during Rosalie’s nap time and in the evenings, but I know my limitations; if I try and take on too much, or work too late, then those juggling balls will fall to the ground and I’ll be a stressed out mummy (no good for Rosalie) and a terrible proofreader (no good to my clients).

As Rosalie gets older I’m sure the way I manage my time will change; she will start to play more independently, eventually she will go to preschool, then real school, giving me greater flexibility and more time during the day to work. But I am not wishing for those days to come any quicker than they have to. I already feel like time is going too fast.

So for now I will continue performing the juggling act and hope I can pull it off.

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2 Comments

  • Reply
    LittleOandme
    February 27, 2015 at 9:01 pm

    I am so glad I read this post today. I have been working from home for the last month and I too find it such a juggling act and have found myself looking forward to nap times (when they happen!) and bedtime, I then feel incredibly guilty! I have also found myself feeling guilty whilst doing chores, but like you say Oliver needs to learn how to play independently and also how to do the washing! It is nice to know that other people are going through the same struggles! Anyway I'll stop rambling, but thank you for making me feel better!!
    Xxx

  • Reply
    Jess Eliot
    February 27, 2015 at 10:51 pm

    It is really hard not to feel guilty isn't it? Finding a balance, and fitting everything in is just so tricky. I'm glad you rambled, and that I made you feel a little better Becky πŸ™‚ I'll come to you next time I need a wahm rant xx

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